Finding Wisdom: Developing a Wisdom Mindset

Craig 00:01 

Wisdom is everywhere … seriously, it is. Every little event of every seemingly-common day offers opportunities to gain wisdom, wisdom that you can use to live an excellent life. How can you turn everyday events into deep wisdom? Keep listening and learn how to develop a wisdom mindset that will serve you well in your journey to flourishing.

Welcome to Live Well and Flourish, where I help you understand what it means to live a flourishing life. I'm your host, Craig Van Slyke. If you're ready to think beyond material and external success, if you're ready to take control of who you are and the kind of life you live, if you're ready to flourish, this is the podcast for you.

Craig 00:56 

One of the guiding maxims of my life is “See your possibilities, not your limitations.” I’ve mentioned this a few times on this podcast; in fact, I did an episode on it. You can check it out at livewellandflourish.com/45. “See your possibilities, not your limitations” … that little saying contains a whole lot of wisdom and it’s guided many of the decisions I’ve made in my life. Guess which Stoic philosopher wrote those words. … Trick question … I heard that line in an otherwise utterly forgettable movie. I really can’t remember anything else about the movie; just that one character said to another “See your possibilities, not your limitations.”

That experience taught me something beyond the importance of focusing on what IS possible. It also taught me that wisdom is everywhere. Wisdom surrounds us every waking moment. We just have to discover the wisdom that lies within the everyday. That’s what I want to talk to you about today … developing a wisdom mindset that lets you engage with ordinary experiences to discover the wisdom within.

Craig 02:12 

Throughout this episode, I’m going to use the word wisdom to refer to a special kind of wisdom, practical wisdom. Practical wisdom is the ability to make judgments and decisions that align with virtue and reason … that allow you to live a flourishing life. It’s not about having theoretical knowledge, it’s about knowing how to apply that knowledge to live an excellent life. Practical wisdom puts virtue into action in your day-to-day life. It bridges the ideals of virtue and the practicalities of everyday decision-making.

Here’s the thing about practical wisdom -- for it to exist it has to be personalized and internalized. Sure, there are common elements across people, but at the end of the day, for practical wisdom to be practical, it has to be applied within your particular state of existence. YOUR practical wisdom becomes practical when it’s applied to YOUR life. You can’t take my wisdom and just plop it into your life. For practical wisdom to be effective it has to become YOURS.

Craig 03:18 

There are lots of ways to develop practical wisdom. You can build wisdom by studying the works of great philosophers and thinkers. You can build wisdom by working with a mentor. You can debate and discuss wisdom with well-informed others … there are a lot of ways. What we’ll talk about today is my particular twist on this, developing practical wisdom by having a wisdom mindset that lets you recognize and internalize wisdom wherever you find it.

Let me give you a few examples of where I’ve found wisdom in unexpected places.

We’re going through a drought at the moment here in Louisiana, although it is finally easing. At one point I was pretty worried and stressed about the state of the pastures and our pond. Then I heard the Ozark Mountain Daredevils song, “It’ll Shine When it Shines.” The song’s title says a lot; the sun will shine when it shines … not when you want it to shine. The song also says that the singer is “Just a good ole boy that’s learned to wait.” When I heard this the lyrics hit me squarely between the eyes. I couldn’t control the rain; just as the sun will shine when it shines, it will rain when it rains. All my worry, all of my stress, that's not gonna bring the rain. So, I reminded myself of this inescapable fact and decided to just wait until it rained. In fact, when talking about the drought, and we talk about the drought a lot, I started saying “Well, It’ll rain when it rains” When I find myself stressing over uncontrollable events, I remind myself that “the sun will shine when it shines.”

Craig 05:01 

Here’s another example from music. Willie Nelson has a song, “Something You Get Through.” In the chorus, Willie sings, “It’s not something you get over, it’s something you get through.” Hearing this brought a couple of bits of practical wisdom to light. First, the line reminded me that we all suffer. Lamenting the suffering isn’t really useful, but neither is denying that you’re suffering. The song also reminded me that some suffering never really ends. I’ll never completely get over the loss of my first wife, Debbie. I'll tell you, it’s a good thing nobody ever said to me “Get over it.” I’m not a violent man, but I might have made an exception. “Get over it” is a terrible thing to say to someone who’s suffering. But, “You’ll get through it” … that’s a message of hope, especially if it’s followed by “And I’ll help you.” Willie’s little line helped me recognize that it’s perfectly OK to not ever fully get over something terrible. Sometimes all you can, or should, expect is to get through it. That’s a lot of wisdom in eleven words (I think I counted correctly).

Craig 06:13 

I’ve also gained some wisdom by watching our animals. They sleep when they’re tired, eat when they’re hungry, drink when they’re thirsty, and have fun when the mood strikes them. Our little cat Taz will just start tearing around the house for no apparent reason other than she felt like having a romp. Our animals are also incredibly loving and loyal. They forgive quickly and don’t hold grudges. They take great joy in the simplest of things, like an unexpected treat. I’m trying to emulate them and find more joy and pleasure in the moment. I’m also trying to be more forgiving. Again, that’s a lot of wisdom from just observing some critters.

So, how can you open yourself to discovering wisdom in everyday moments? By developing a practical wisdom mindset that makes your mind receptive to the lessons life constantly presents.

Craig 07:07 

A practical wisdom mindset is a way of thinking that is oriented towards recognizing and applying wisdom in daily life. It’s an openness to finding wisdom in the seemingly mundane. Someone with a practical wisdom mindset is open-minded and reflective. They’re also naturally curious and open to change when it's warranted.

There are three key parts to a practical wisdom mindset. The first is what I call your “wisdom radar.” When you’ve fine tuned your wisdom radar, you’ll automatically be scanning for nuggets that you can refine into wisdom. You might be reading, watching or listening to something. You might be having an ordinary conversation or an ordinary interaction with somebody. You might just be observing some little aspect of life. It doesn’t really matter. You’ll be open to receiving the wisdom whenever and however the universe presents it. This, of course, takes a little practice, but through consistent conscious practice, eventually your wisdom radar will become second-nature.

Craig 08:14 

OK, so you’re open to and aware of opportunities for gaining wisdom. That’s great, but it’s not enough. You need to make that little nugget YOUR wisdom. This requires reflection. Reflection is critical to living an excellent life, as I discussed in episode 25. In the context of practical wisdom, reflection does two things. First, reflection helps you make sense of the nugget as wisdom. This involves connecting the nugget with your beliefs, experiences and knowledge. Reflection kind of molds the nugget into wisdom through these connections. For example, when I heard “See your possibilities, not your limitations” I started thinking about how my life might have been better if I had focused on my possibilities. I also started thinking about situations I was currently facing and how a “possibilities” orientation could help me live a better life. Remember, practical wisdom is practical because it’s applied. Reflection helps you understand how you might apply the little nugget of wisdom.

Craig 09:20  

Reflection serves another important purpose. It helps you retain the new bit of wisdom that you’ve discovered. If you don’t remember it, you won’t apply it so it really won’t be practical wisdom. By reflecting on the nugget, you connect it with other things in your mind, which helps you retain what you’ve learned. Reflection is awesome for your flourishing. In some ways, it's kind of a superpower … or super practice.

Once you’ve captured and made sense of the nugget of wisdom, you have to actually apply it. At the risk of being even more repetitive, practical wisdom must be applied … it must be practiced. The conscious application of the wisdom will further burn it into your brain until the bit of wisdom becomes part of who you are. Practice also gives you the opportunity to refine the wisdom. Wisdom is kind of a living thing that can evolve as you experience its use. Refining the wisdom is another round of reflection. But this time you reflect on whether the wisdom was useful and whether it fit with your particular view of virtue. Again, it’s YOUR wisdom. This process of application, reflection, and refinement is ongoing. It’s a continuous cycle of learning and adaptation.

Craig 10:38 

So, you’re convinced that you need to develop a practical wisdom mindset. Well, how can you do this? I’ll get to that in a second. First, though, I want to remind you to sign up for my email list so you won’t miss out on some of the good stuff that's coming soon. Just go to livewellandflourish.com and fill out the little form. 

OK, I'm gonna take a little bit of a different approach to this week's “Three Things” segment, instead of three separate activities, I’m going to give you a practice you can easily put into place to develop your wisdom mindset. And you're actually getting a bonus, since the practice has four steps, active awareness, capture, reflection, and application. I'll cover each of these in turn.

Craig 11:23 

●       Active awareness/openness - Each day during a 30 minute period, actively seek experiences you can turn into wisdom. This might be something you read, watch or listen to, an observation you make, a conversation you have, or even a passing thought. Don’t do anything special, just pay active attention to opportunities for wisdom.

●       Capture - Then capture whatever nuggets of wisdom you identify. Write them in a notebook, take a note on your phone, make a voice memo … whatever works for you. Just make a record of the nugget somehow. You might also want to note the context in which you discovered the nugget. That will help you be more open to discovering nuggets in the future.

●       Reflection - At the end of the day, set aside 30 minutes or so to reflect on your nuggets and find the meaning and wisdom in them. It’s important that you personalize the wisdom, after all, it’s your wisdom. This will work best if you write down your reflections. As you reflect, think about why these particular nuggets appealed to you.

●       Application - Alright, now we get to application. At the beginning of the next day, review your list and revisit your reflections. Then, throughout the day, look for opportunities to apply the wisdom. When you apply the wisdom, make note of it to help burn it into your memory. If you want to go a step further, think back through past events and see if there were any situations in which the new wisdom might have been helpful.

Craig 12:51 

Do this for a week or two, and I’m quite certain you’ll have a well-developed wisdom radar and the ability to create your own wisdom from everyday events. I don't know about you, but I think that’s a pretty awesome skill.

Remember, there’s a universe of wisdom just waiting for you. Seek and you will find, and, as a result, you'll live a more flourishing life.

I’ll leave you with a little nugget of wisdom from a Dire Straits song, I think it was written by Mark Knofler, “Sometimes you’re the windshield, sometimes you’re the bug.” Life is unpredictable and it has its ups and its downs. Remember, the bad times are what make the good times so good.

Until next time, seek wisdom my friends.

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Until next time.